Are You Being Honest With Yourself?


Fifty or sixty years ago, if you had asked someone if they were honest or truthful, they would have looked at you as if you had two heads. At that time, there was no discernable difference between the two.

Our attitudes have changed so much that today people often manipulate their words and actions so they are scrupulously truthful without being absolutely honest.

Society’s acceptance of relative honesty is the opposite of what we learn in Scripture. The Lord requires absolute honesty from all of us at all times in every aspect of our life.

Sooner or later we all have to face the dishonesty within ourselves. And that dishonesty is especially harmful if it is related to our current financial situation.

Let’s dig into those areas where you may be lying to yourself.

Needs are the basics in life—food clothing and shelter. Wants are anything above and beyond basic needs. Things like the newest cell phone, the bigger house, restaurant meals or the latest fashions are all wants. It is really easy to convince yourself that you NEED something when in reality, you really just WANT it.

Don’t confuse yourself by calling the things you WANT a NEED. Because once you start confusing needs and wants it is easy to talk yourself into buying anything that catches your eye. It is not necessarily bad to fulfill your wants. In fact, as humans, we are wired to have goals and dreams, but be totally honest about which is which.

We are also being dishonest with ourselves if we think that the next thing we buy will make us happy. Happiness is a state of mind and while you may get some temporary satisfaction out of a new possession, it will never bring happiness for long. Setting yourself up to be happy based on buying things puts you in a never-ending cycle of “what’s next?” It’s hard to be happy if you never stop and appreciate what God has already given you.

In 1 Timothy 6:8, we read: “If we have food and clothing, we shall be content.”  It is much harder to be content if you have food, clothing, and shelter, plus a long list of unfulfilled “needs” and a never-ending inventory of things to buy which will finally bring you happiness. If you aren’t happy with what you have, you will never be happy when you get what you want.

Another way we may be lying to ourselves is when we justify being in debt because “everybody has debt.” There’s the school loan, the car loan, the mortgage, the second mortgage and all the credit card debt.  If you are using debt to subsidize a lifestyle you can’t afford, you are just being dishonest with yourself.

In order to gain control and spend less than you make, it’s crucial to live within your means. Try writing down everything you spend money on for a few months and organize your spending into categories. (Here is a helpful spreadsheet.) Once you have a few months of spending in a format you can review, it will help you develop a spending plan so you can manage what’s coming in vs what is going out.

If we convince ourselves that we don’t make enough money to save anything it’s another big lie. You may not be able to save a significant amount of money but if you are not saving anything, sooner or later you will be forced to use debt when there a health issue, an accident, an appliance that needs to be replaced or a major repair to the car. Those unexpected expenses hit everyone sooner or later. And if you haven’t saved any money, the only option is the credit cards or a loan.

We can again lie to ourselves by delaying retirement savings because there will be time for that later. The best way to build a retirement savings account is to start early and save on a regular basis. In Proverbs 21:5 we are encouraged to save on a regular basis “Steady plodding brings prosperity…” Every American should be saving for retirement in some way. if your employer offers a 401k match, take advantage of it. A 401k match is a free money from your employer to reward you for something you should be doing anyway.

Getting hoodwinked into investing in something because the returns on your investment are too good to be true means you are believing someone else’s lie. When these “can’t miss” investment opportunities are presented to you, keep your greed in check. Taking big risks out of desperation for a quick gain usually results in losing your original investment. In 1 Timothy 6:9, we read “Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and are caught in the trap of many foolish and harmful desires which pull them down to ruin and destruction.”

And considering that everything we have is a gift from God, our biggest lie is thinking that we don’t make enough money to be generous. Or we convince ourselves that we need the money more than the church does. The act of giving starts with what we have, not what we think we need in order to be generous.

When we are tempted to be stingy due to a perceived lack of resources, remember Acts 20:35, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Giving is a way for us to honor God and acknowledge him as the source of everything we have.

The best way to get your finances under control is to be honest with yourself.

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